My husband & the pink toothbrush

Today is devastating.

I can’t bring myself to turn on the television or listen to the radio right now. The news coming out of Las Vegas is too much to bear. The photos from Puerto Rico are haunting.

We live in complicated, confusing, combustible times.

So, when my husband bought a new toothbrush this weekend, I laughed so hard tears rolled down my face. Happy tears. Emotional release tears.

We visited the mountains this weekend to see some of Colorado’s fall beauty. The hilltops around Vail were dusted with sugary, early-season snow and the aspens were at the peak of colorful change with oranges and yellows so bright. The eye candy was on point.

When we arrived at the hotel, my husband — The Weed — realized he forgot to pack a toothbrush. He jogged over to a nearby ‘general store’ and picked up two sodas and a new toothbrush. When he got back to the room, he placed the sodas and his new toothbrush on the counter and proudly said: ‘This just cost me $23. I had to do a double take when the clerk told me the total.’

Having been to Vail before, The Weed and I know food and goods are priced at a premium in the resort town. So, paying $23 for two Cokes and a toothbrush was a little understandable but also completely insane.

I picked up the toothbrush and started laughing when I saw the price tag: $16.49.

‘There’s your problem, dude … You just purchased the world’s most-expensive toothbrush!’ I exclaimed as The Weed cracked his Coke and tried to ignore my glee.

Then, I rotated the box, expecting to see some gold plating or a celebrity endorsement worthy of such a price. Instead, I noticed the brush is pink … PINK!!! I couldn’t stop laughing.

My husband, a well-educated aerospace engineer, hardly ever messes up. His resume of blunders is pretty sparse. One notable gaffe: He failed his first driver’s license test as a teen. I think that’s the last time he’s ever done anything that might resemble a mistake. I’ll never let him forget it either.

So, seeing him assemble his battery-operated pink toothbrush and rejoice in its vibrating head, was almost as rewarding as hiking around Vail Mountain later that afternoon. I was breathless both times.

I guess what makes my husband & the pink toothbrush so crazy to me is his utter lack of boobery and the irony that he’s now practicing safe dental hygiene with a pink toothbrush right as breast cancer awareness campaigns hit full stride and October becomes Pinktober. Ugh.

Paying nearly $17 for a toothbrush is laughable. Paying nearly $17 for a pink toothbrush during Pinktober is just, well, annoying. Mostly to me.

October is a tough time of year for many people living with breast cancer. The ‘awareness’ campaigns are ubiquitous and, usually, pretty dumb. The pink ribbons tacked up in restaurants and retail shops often get a dramatic eye roll from me. There are fun runs and rah-rah walks that I will never participate in.

There’s nothing pink about cancer. The good people at Breast Cancer Action understand this and for years have been working to ensure people know many breast cancer awareness campaigns do little to help combat the disease and more to line retailers' coffers.

This year, Breast Cancer Action is marking the 25th anniversary of the pink ribbon with Knot Our Pink Ribbon. The effort is aimed at telling cosmetics giant Estee Lauder to stop its annual pink ribbon antics.

‘On the 25th anniversary of the pink ribbon, we’re not celebrating. We’re angry. Angry that a quarter of a million women are diagnosed with breast cancer each year. Angry that more than 40,000 women die each and every year. And angry that women of color and underserved communities are disproportionately burdened. There is too little to show for 25 years of pink ribbon awareness and billions of dollars spent on pink ribbon products,’ Breast Cancer Action stated in announcing the campaign.

To tell Estee Lauder to stop its pink ribbon marketing, Breast Cancer Action urges people to:

Send a letter to Estee Lauder and tell them that after 25 years, it’s time to stop the betrayal and be honest that:

> Empty awareness and publicity stunts are a distraction and cannot ‘create a breast cancer-free world.’

> No amount of positive thinking will prevent women from being diagnosed with or dying from breast cancer.

> The chemicals in their products may increase the risk of breast cancer and might even interfere with treatment. Tell them to clean up their products and stop pinkwashing!

To learn more about Breast Cancer Action’s Knot Our Pink Ribbon campaign, visit https://bcaction.org/knot-our-pink-ribbon.

I plan to do my part and send a letter, detailing my personal history with the disease and urging an end to pink ribbon efforts.

Then, I will happily think about my husband and the pink toothbrush. It’s the only pink product I plan to enjoy this month.